The Woman in Black Review
Well I went to go see the Woman in Black today with a group of friends and i have to say that it was a pretty good movie overall. HOWEVER! I disliked the ending because it was so stupid.
#Warning! This post/page will contain spoilers! If you don’t want the movie to be spoiled, quit reading here!#
Daniel Radcliffe was in this movie (HARRY POTTER!!!!) and that’s really the only reason I went next to the fact that it was a horror movie and I’ve never actually seen a horror movie while it was in the theaters. This movie had me screaming from the first 5 minutes in. It was me and probably 4 other friends and we went the day after the opening and surprisingly the theater wasn’t full. hmmm… But anyways I have to say that I had a wonderful day filled with shrinking into my chair in the first few minutes, screaming and then laughing with everyone because I was so scared, and peeking through my fingers and covering my ears in sheer fright.
The story starts with Daniel Radcliffe as the main character who is a single parent, raising his child and he’s…Well i think he’s like a real estate agent or something along those lines. And he goes to this town where everyone knows each other and he’s told to go check out and sort out this dead woman’s papers so they can sell the house. But the people in town want him to leave, to which he insists on staying. As soon as he gets to the creepy ass house we already know shit’s going down. He sees a strange woman in the graveyard on the property from the window. Then he hears strange thumping noises and finds only one door is locked. Through out the story we begin to find that the dead woman who’s house he’s in lost her nephew in the marsh land outside the house and it was her sister’s who she got locked away in a mental institution. We learn that the sister is the woman in black and she is responsible for killing children in the nearby town whenever she is seen.
Daniel goes on his way sorting through the paper work and coming across strange things until he cannot deny that something in this house is wrong. He figures out that the woman just wants her son and he goes out to find the woman’s son in the marsh. He does and he reunites the pair. but at the end of the movie, it gets sucky and stupid. The nanny brings up Daniel’s kid to meet up with him and he tells her to go get tickets so they could go back to London and as Daniel is talking to one of the guys that helped him through the whole house issue and the woman in black , his son walks away and kind of gets possessed by the woman in black like all the other kids do when they kill themselves. He walks on the railroad tracks and, seeing the oncoming train, Daniel rushes to get his kid but doesn’t make it. So at the end of the movie they fucking get hit by a train and after me and my friends are out of the movie one of my friends who wasn’t like even scared in the movie was like, “It was a cute ending!” I turn and look at her and say “It was a cute ending when they got hit by a FUCKING TRAIN?!?!?” thank you Ashley Hamlin.
Issues I found with this movie.
1) No harry potter references
2) Because Daniel Radcliffe is in this movie and he IS Harry Fucking Potter, I found that throughout the whole movie, all of us were making harry potter jokes and references. I mean it’s like, he was harry potter for a long time and to see him in this movie was like, He’s harry potter so that’s why i’m going to see the movie.
3) The ending sucked ass
4)The advertisement was scarier than the actual film. I think we have another “The Devil Inside”. It was a scary movie but it was more scary pop ups and suspense.
If you would like to read all of the silly ass references we made during the movie read on down.
-When there are creepy ass dolls “OMG WAS THAT A HITLER DOLL?!” Ashley Hamlin. Everyone in the theater pretty much busted up laughing.
-Begininning of movie when the kids are having their tea party “OMG they’re invisible children having invisible tea!”-Me (i’m referring to the invisible children organization to which I joked about the children being invisible because they didn’t show the kids in the first few frames)
-Daniel is on the train reading the paper “*GASP*Harry isn’t reading the daily prophet and the pictures aren’t moving!!”
-Daniel falls asleep on the train and there’s lightning outside “OMG A DEMENTOR!!!”me
-Daniel arrives at a pub in the creepy town “OMG IT’S LEAKY CAULDRON!!!” me
-Daniel is in the attic in this creepy hotelish place “It looks just like the closet you used to stay in as a boy harry” me
-a ginger kid walks in holding his ginger sister up cause she’s hurt “RON! What did u do Hermione!”me
-In the graveyard with the weeping angels on the moselium “Am i seeing a Dr. Who reference here?” me
-Scary part in movie happens “LOL” thank you Madi Von Rotz, everyone laughed because it was a wtf moment
-Harry hears a thumping upstairs “It’s proffesor Snape”, “then why is he making those thumping noises?” “Idk” “hermione’s up there too then” “:O”-Me and Curtis
-Daniel hears thumping noise and there is suspense “It’s obviously Voldemort” Elizabeth
-Daniel has candle in his hand and then it’s gone “where the fuck did the other candle go?” Some random guy behind us
-Daniel has a dream about his dead wife “Who is this bitch and where is GINNY??!!?!”- me
-Shows a picture of woman in blacks kids name which happens to be Nathaniel “OMG it’s hippie hipster bitch!” -me, Me and ash and liz go to school with a nathaniel and on Ashley’s contacts he’s called hippie hipster bitch
-Daniel gets killed with son by train “OK, so a fucking train can kill him, but Voldemor can’t?!!?!? WHAT?!??!”
-Daniel looks/appears to be alive but isn’t “OMG HE’S ALIVE!” “no he isn’t” “…yes he is! he just crossed over to platform 9 and 3/4! that’s why there’s no other people!” Me and the people behind us and ash
-Daniel, kid and wife are talking at the train station and are dead “NO!!! He isn’t dead! He’s just at kings crossing like in deathly hallows to visit dumbledor! any minute now he’ll come out and Harry will ask “is this a dream professor?!””-me
-Daniel is going into the dark by himself to find the mysterious thumping noise “IT’S THE MYSTERIOUS TICKING NOISE! :D” -me
-Daniel is going into the dark by himself to open the damn door “NO HARRY! WHERE IS YOUR WAND?! AT LEAST TAKE DOBBY WITH YOU!”
-Daniel is in the dark and can’t see and is trying to find something “Damn it harry! You know you can’t see without your glasses!”-me
-While on the train “Harry James potter! if you put another toe out of line , we’ll bring you straight home!”-Madi Von Rotz
-Daniel is carrying an ax and candle “Has he suddenly turned into Buffy the vampire slayer?!”-me
-Creepy ass doll is dancing and playing music “he looks like Ziggy Stardust!”-Me
-Hears a wierd noise coming from somewhere “I HEAR BUCKBEAK!”-me
-Sees woman in black approaching Daniel “TAKE OUT YOUR WAND HARRY AND CAST AVADKADAVRA!!!” -me
If i remember anymore or if i think of any more i shall put them up! but this movie was honestly only good when I was being scared shitless and when harry potter references were being made. It is worht the money to buy a ticket but, if you don’t like harry potter or horror movies, don’t go see it